Most guests maintain excessive reward for nationwide parks. On Tripadvisor, solely 88 individuals out of greater than 23,480 commenters had been essential of the Grand Canyon’s South Rim. On Yelp, roughly 1 p.c of reviewers had been disenchanted by the Arizona landmark that Ken B. of Tucson described on Yelp as “A gap. A really, very massive gap.” After numerous “wow” and “beautiful” critiques, nonetheless, the destructive critiques are an entertaining and illuminating detour to the land of disillusionment.

The Nationwide Park Providers is trying on the brilliant mentioned, although. “One star is best than none. For extra stars, we advocate visiting at night time,” NPS mentioned in an e-mail. “We’re at all times in search of methods to enhance the customer expertise and we welcome suggestions and critiques, though we nonetheless don’t have any management over clouds that block the view or bugs that observe you on the path.”

Amber Share, a Raleigh-based creator and artist, illustrated the dangerous critiques for her Subpar Parks challenge. “I believe they’re so humorous as a result of individuals had actually excessive expectations, and nature doesn’t at all times cooperate,” she mentioned. “Typically you may make the selection to embrace what it truly is, and different instances it’s simply going to actually make you mad.”

In 2019, Share began mining Yelp, Tripadvisor and Google Critiques for materials. She tried to suss out the real feedback from the jokes and targeted on critiques that panned pure sights. She posted her paintings on her Instagram account, which has amassed 415,000 followers, and compiled her creations in a guide and postcard assortment. She mentioned a number of nationwide park guests facilities now carry her guide, which was revealed in 2021. For instance of life imitating artwork imitating life, her publication has obtained plenty of one-star critiques.

“Some individuals wished there have been fewer phrases,” she mentioned.

We just lately performed our personal deep dive into poor critiques and unearthed some golden nuggets as priceless because the parks themselves. Right here’s our roundup of one-star critiques, which we calmly edited for readability and size.

Yosemite: ‘An actual dud’

An actual dud. … An actual Wally World as we needed to flip round.

— Rona B., Lake Forest, Calif., August 2020, on Yelp

If I had been you, keep on the awanee [Ahwahnee] after which get out of Dodge. We didn’t even see any bears on our go to — how lame is that.

— David H., Redwood, Calif., October 2015, on Yelp

Yellowstone: Smells like rotten eggs

In all places you go, there’s this lingering scent of rotten eggs. You’d suppose for the $35 entrance price the park individuals might set up some airwicks Air Wicks or one thing.

— C. S., Flagstaff, Ariz., September 2020, on Yelp

Very scenic, nonetheless, you’ll be able to see the identical throughout this space. ID, MT, WY all nice, and so they don’t price $30 to get into.

— Brian Ok., London, Ohio, August 2018, on Yelp

No vegetation, no life. It’s like an image of dying.

— Sara L., Mars, Pa., August 2016, on Yelp

It’s to[o] massive. … Additionally my spouse determined to divorce me whereas we had been there.

— Landon W., Innisfail, Alberta, Canada, April 4, 2019, on Yelp

Grand Teton: Mountains obscure the views

Might be higher. Mountains had been blocking the sundown.

— Evan Josiah, two years in the past on Google Critiques

The mountains look good, however Yellowstone is manner higher, and it’s proper subsequent to it.

— Nathan W., North Hollywood, July 2018, on Yelp

Dying Valley: ‘A large litter field’

Not a fan of discovering nothing in the midst of nowhere. It’s like visiting a large litter field.

— Andy Hobbs, 5 years in the past on Google Critiques

Such an extended, lonely drive, and once you get there, it appears as useless because the floor of the moon. However, hey, you come all that approach to say you stood underneath sea stage. Whoo hoo.

— Asher Allen, 5 years in the past on Google Critiques

Massive Bend: Unfriendly lizards

Was certainly Massive but in addition HOT. They need to name it Massive HOT Bend. 1 star.

— Kait Nicole, a month in the past on Google Critiques

The lizards weren’t pleasant.

— Natalia Peck, 4 years in the past on Google Critiques

— Angel Bueno, 4 years in the past on Google Critiques

Badlands: Filled with outdated, brown mud

Badlands is principally washed-out hills of fifty,000-year-old mud. You’ve huge grasslands on one aspect and outdated mud on the opposite. And the mud wasn’t even in another way coloured layers or have every other redeeming qualities. It was brown.

— Henry H., Las Vegas, September 2010, on Yelp

When you’ve seen a couple of timber and plenty of grass, it’s all very samey, albeit in numerous mini ecosystems.

— Fraser’s Travels & Craft Beer, Chelmsford, England, November 2018, on Tripadvisor

Can’t imagine we wasted time happening this loop. We actually are nonetheless on it and there’s nothing fascinating, so we’re on our telephones.

— Jamie and Brianna V., Colman, S.D., January 2024, on Yelp

Indiana Dunes: An insult to different nationwide parks

I can’t beat across the bush with this one: To name this a Nationwide Park is an atrocity, an absolute insult to all the others. My spouse and I’ve been to significantly better county parks! Nevertheless, if you happen to like run-down boardwalks that take you to overlooks exhibiting nothing, nice views of metal mills, railroad traces and a nuclear energy plant mixed with a run-down city really feel, this may occasionally simply be the place of your goals.

— Invoice H., Brighton, Mich., August 2019, on Yelp

Joshua Tree: ‘Only a pile of rocks’

Only a pile of rocks scattered across the filth with random scraggly cactuses in the way in which of the surroundings. … Joshua Tree might actually use assist to revive the rocks with metal beams and poured foundations so the park attendees don’t should be reminded of the unhappy state of breakdown throughout us.

— Blair B., Encinitas, Calif., April 2022, on Yelp

Desert, some flowers, some cactuses, some palm timber, however boring.

— Genaro G., West Linn, Ore., March 2019, on Yelp

Petrified Forest: A ‘large nothingburger’

Zero noteworthy trails. Barely any important discovery available. It’s not even open previous sundown. … Jogged my memory of a poorly executed state park. One large nothingburger.

— Jordan Halvorsen, a 12 months in the past on Google Critiques

Mainly it’s a knockoff of the Badlands. They need to pay you to enter the park.

— Rob Sims, 5 years in the past on Google Critiques

White Sands: An excessive amount of sand

It was too sandy, and so they gave me a ticket for going 30 in a ten mph zone, pathetic. … It is a -10/10. By no means going again. They need to’ve made a water park out of this.

— Josie, October 2021, on Tripadvisor

Actually miles of … white sand? No playgrounds or something actually for the youngsters until they wanna slide down the sand hills, which was not that nice to be sincere. Only a few shaded areas as properly.

— Fatwood, Alamogordo, N.M., August 2017, on Tripadvisor

Rocky Mountain: Elk rubbernecking

Tremendous unimpressed with this park. It’s simply boring! It’s like several forest in CO that you might drive by means of totally free in Genesee or Evergreen. … The individuals who cease to stare at elk and trigger an hour backup that nobody can go round, you simply have to attend, sucks.

— Christy Ok., Denver, October 2017, on Yelp

Hawaii Volcanoes: ‘Empty Walmart parking zone’

Went on the hike by means of the outdated volcano. It was like strolling by means of an empty Walmart parking zone.

— Andy B., Duncanville, Tex., March 2020, on Yelp

Kenai Fjords: Not very thrilling whales

We had by no means been to Alaska, by no means seen whales or glaciers. We truly did see whales, however on the time I actually didn’t suppose it was so thrilling.

— Susan Ok., July 2017, on Tripadvisor